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English 111 G/H Rhetoric
and Composition
Essay 1
See an example Essay 1
E1: A critique of self
Through reading essays by Shelby Steele, Susan
Douglas, Julia Penelope, and Richard Rodriguez, we have been
exploring the relationship between society and the individual.
In your essay, you will identify the forces that influence you
and discuss how. You will consider how much control you have
over your identity.
This essay will build on the analytical and argumentative
skills you have been developing while discussing the readings
and writing learning log assignments. Writing summaries and discussing
important themes in the readings will have made you aggressive,
critical readers. You will have learned not just to read to comprehend
as a believer, but also to question as a doubter, to analyze,
and to apply the ideas in the readings, both in the context of
school and your own lives. Use those same critical thinking skills
to analyze your own experiences through your writing.
Writing this essay will also teach you several important things
that you’ll use throughout this class:
- the drafting and revising process
- creating a thesis/enthymeme and structuring an argument
- providing supporting evidence
- creating paragraphs and the general structure of an essay
- performing research and analysis
Your thesis statement should be an enthymeme, a claim with
a "because" clause, that states what you have learned
about yourself through your analysis. Here’s an example:
It can be difficult to construct an essay
that can stand on its own and make sense to an audience that
does not have you there to explain, clarify, or develop your
ideas. Details and specific examples will help. Your peers will
help you see places where they needed detail or explanations
in your essay.
Answer these questions first:
- Who am I, what are my characteristics, and how have I become
that person?
- What forces help determine how I act and think in various
situations?
- How do I know this? Where in my life do I see these forces
at work?
Then forecast the significance of your analysis:
- How can I modify my thoughts and behaviors to become more
of what I want to be?
- How can I continue to develop according to my plans and goals?
You will do a great deal of writing and reflecting, but in
the final essay you submit, you need to emphasize how
you have been influenced by the social force you have identified.
You will need to analyze the influence that had a part in creating
or "constructing" you. Then you will need to consider
whether you are controlling the influence you’ve specified
and acting as a self-aware person who can make certain choices
about how you will conduct your life. If you conclude that you’re
not controlling it, suggest some ways that might allow you to
be able to do so in the future. Steele’s "The Recomposed
Self" provides an example of how to complete an analysis
of a force shaping a person’s view of himself and of his
actions. The structure and organization of Steele’s essay
also serves as a model for this kind of writing. Consider also
how Rodriguez made himself into a super student only to find,
after extensive reflection, that he had gained that identity
only through losing his family. He realized that he wanted his
family and himself, and he had to change course to get that.
The readings discuss many influences that work to shape human
lives. Consider those readings and do some of the same work that
those writers do. Some sources of influence in the readings that
you might explore include
- family history and culture (as Rodriguez wrote about)
- media, gender, and physical appearance (as in Douglas’
essay)
- social and economic class, race and ethnicity (see Rodriguez
and Steele)
- language (see Penelope).
You will discover other sources of influence as you work through
the prewriting assignments for this essay. Remember to focus
on yourself; this is not an essay on the most significant person
in your life.
The purpose of the essay is for you to both reveal and analyze.
Be careful not to make yourself sound like a stereotype or parody
of who you truly are. Recognize the complexity of being a human
being with real and perceived vulnerabilities. Contemporary American
culture has a tendency to reveal more than analyze. Consider
television talk shows you have watched or heard about. Often
the emphasis of such shows is on revealing secrets but not on
how to deal with the effects of those secrets. American society
sometimes seems fascinated with the concept of dysfunction, acting
as if just recognizing that an influence is at work—no matter
how important—is enough.
We do need to understand that certain aspects of our lives
in society have had an overwhelming influence, but recognition
alone is not enough. Analysis and conscious corrective behavior
are the keys to success and feeling good about how you live and
think, as the course readings have suggested.
Use anecdotal evidence to illustrate the influence you will
be analyzing. Complete the assignments described next to help
you think. We will discuss strategies for organizing the essay
as we work. The readings serve not only as examples of analysis
but also of presentation. We will consider their structure closely.
E1 due date: ___/___ Length: 3-5 pages.
Prewriting assignments
Assignment #1: Exploratory
writing
These exercises will help you determine
the extent to which various forces--common in American society--influence
your life and your idea of self. They will help you uncover the
social constructions that you apply and which are applied to
you. Work through the list and consider how the factors mentioned
affect the areas of your life that you are examining.
Create lists of people, places, and concepts
that have had significant influence in your life. Here are some
suggested categories to use to generate material for analysis:
People Places Concepts
family home faith and religious beliefs
loved ones special rooms ethics and morality
friends work places goals and desires
teachers school responsibilities and loyalties
groups nature gender and ethnicity
heroes hideaways history and culture
When working through these lists, use an identify-explore-evaluate
procedure. First, identify the person, place, or concept
that had an influence on you. Second, explore that influence.
Use freewriting and brainstorming to generate lots of information
about the source and its influence. Uncover information about
how, specifically, the influence shows up in your life. Third,
evaluate the influence. Write a brief paragraph that reflects
on what you learned through your exploration and evaluates the
influence, whether good or bad. In other words, move toward being
able to name and discuss the influence to other people in a way
that makes sense.
Here is another list that you can explore through freewriting
and brainstorming. Consider the previous prewriting activity
and name all the shoulds, coulds, and woulds
you can think of.
- Shoulds: How you feel you must act or things
you feel you must do
- Coulds: The possibilities—what you might do
- Woulds: What you’d do differently if you had things
to do over
The purpose of this exploratory writing is to help you generate
information that you can reflect upon as you work through the
critique of self. Don’t worry about writing complete sentences
or using everything in your essay. Capture the ideas first. Do
you have to write on all of them? No. You may already know how
much a certain area affects you. Do a thorough job of examining
that area. It’s more helpful for you to have a deep understanding
about a few areas than lots of shallow information about all
of them. Be sure to move on to analysis.
Hand in your exploratory writing on ___/___.
Assignment #2: Cinema-acceptance
speech
Use this exercise to place yourself
in the future and imagine yourself winning an award. It can be
anything from a Nobel Prize to an Academy Award. Review your
accomplishments. Thank those who deserve to be thanked. Explain
your contribution and why it was significant. Feel free to create
your own award. A writer once gave herself the "Best at
Being Me Award." She learned a great deal as she tried to
explain just who she was and why she was important.
Assignment #2 due date: ___/___
Assignment #3: Reminiscence—time
warp
Take yourself back to a significant event in your life, especially
one that you wish had turned out differently. While doing this,
remember to identify, explore, and evaluate,
using this significant event as your focus. Think of an event
in your life that is significant because it shaped the way you
reacted to subsequent events. Do the events now show you how
what you saw and felt was influenced by social construction?
Describe the event in detail. Consider your motives and the motives
of others involved. When you evaluate the event, look at it from
two angles. First, what would you have liked to have done differently
and why? Speculate about how your life would be different if
the scenario turned out as you wished. Second, consider the long-term
influence this event had on your life. How has it directed your
life? Understanding this influence opens the opportunity for
change. How do you plan to act differently to avoid repeating
the same dissatisfying incident?
Assignment #3 due date: ___/___
Assignment #4: Retrospective
A retrospective is a type of remembrance,
a tribute to someone who has a significant impact in various
ways. This exercise asks you to write a "retrospective"
for yourself. Follow the pattern for exploratory writing: identify,
explore, and evaluate. Take yourself through your
entire life as you would like it to be. What were your major
accomplishments? Where did you live? Did you have a family? Imagine
this ideal life. As part of the exploration, write your retrospective.
What would you like said about yourself and the life you led?
In your evaluation, consider what you must do to merit the kinds
of words you have written about yourself.
Assignment #4 due date: ___/___
Evaluation criteria
Use the following questions about
the main elements of an essay to analyze the strengths and weaknesses
of your essay. Use these questions when reading each others’
essays for peer critiquing. Your instructor will be using these
criteria when evaluating your essay.
Description and discussion
of self
- How well does the writer discuss an influence
that has shaped his or her life?
- Where and how does the writer analyze and critique those
influences?
- Does the essay have a clear thesis/enthymeme? Locate it and
evaluate it.
- How well does the organization support the thesis/enthymeme
and the essay assignment?
- Where does the writer need to include more examples/anecdotes
to support the thesis/enthymeme?
Writing process
Your instructor will also look at
your writing process to see whether
- invention strategies are evident through
E1 assignments
- multiple drafts demonstrate development of
essay
- revision is based on peer and instructor
response
- essay has been edited and proofread
General characteristics of
effective essays
Evaluate your essay against the course
goals for English 111. An effective essay will demonstrate these
characteristics.
Critical thinking: Essay demonstrates
control over conceiving and defending a statement about a topic,
including defining and limiting a topic. Makes a clear and arguable
statement about topic, developing statements logically and adequately.
Recognizes complications or alternative viewpoints. Paragraphs
are sequenced and clearly developed.
Argument, structure, and development: Essay makes an argument to an audience. Essay is
structured around a controlling idea or thesis statement. Evidence
illustrates or argues the controlling idea. Evidence is appropriate
to topic and purpose. Evidence is sufficient. Audience is defined
implicitly or explicitly and accommodated through essay. Whole
paper structure supports controlling idea.
Standard edited English awareness: Language use contributes to success of essay. Vocabulary
and syntax are appropriate to purpose and occasion. Sentences
vary to reinforce logic of essay. Essay demonstrates understanding
of standard English conventions, including sentence boundaries
and completeness, concord, appropriate modification, and mechanics,
including spelling, punctuation, and manuscript conventions.
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Copyright 1997 Department of English |
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New Mexico State University |
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Use only with permission |
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